The Haku Game

[El Canuck]

Haku can roast marshmallows and hotdogs over an open fire with his bare hands.

[El Canuck]

Haku can drive any nail with just a single swing of a standard claw hammer.

[El Canuck]

Haku doesn't need a screwdriver or a drill to drive a screw, in fact, he prefers to do it by hand.

[El Canuck]

A Haku Haiku is seventeen syllables, done in traditional breaks of five/seven/five, but spelled out in morse code via strikes. Punches equal a dot, kicks equal a dash and he always "signs" his work with a Tongan Death Grip.

[El Canuck]

When playing baseball, Haku forgoes using a bat, finding it an unnecessary tool for hitting the ball. He prefers a good, solid right cross punch for an easy home run.

[El Canuck]

Haku can see John Cena.

[El Canuck]

Before Brock Lesnar could be given his spot in UFC 200, it first had to be offered to Haku. He passed.

[El Canuck]

Haku has hit a hole in one on a Par 5...With a putter.

[El Canuck]

Haku once paddled a rowboat from California all the way across the Pacific to Tonga.

[El Canuck]

Haku once released a Kraken.

It preferred to remain where it was.

[El Canuck]

Haku eats Big Macs and Whoppers like sliders.

[El Canuck]

Before being allowed to proclaim himself as the "Best in the World", CM Punk was required to make a pilgrimage to Haku's home in Kissimmee, Florida, on foot, to ask permission to use a moniker that is rightfully Haku's.

[El Canuck]

Haku had a short career as a lumberjack, but his style of uprooting trees with a belly-to-bark suplex worried the other lumberjacks.

[Mafwanix]

Haku ripped a copy of "As Fierce as Steel" in half.
With one hand.

[El Canuck]

Haku once qualified to compete for Tonga in every Olympic event. The Olympic committee didn't know what to make of it and politely asked him not to.

[El Canuck]

In 1972, when a bunch of wealthy Americans tried to found the Republic of Minerva in Tongan waters, it was reported that Tonga sent a naval presence to drive them away. Of course, this naval presence was merely a thirteen-year-old Haku in a speedboat. Even at that age, he was a force to be reckoned with and the Americans left hurriedly.

[El Canuck]

Despite his easy knockout of Bart Gunn at WrestleMania XV, Butterbean was not one to mock wrestlers. Rather, Butterbean realized how fortunate he was that Haku was with WCW at the time.

[AndyF1069]

Wrestling Observer Rewind • Dec. 7, 1992

In EMLL, in a six man match, Lucha star Canek saw that Haku was the most over guy in the match and apparently didn't like it. So he decided to take it upon himself to shoot on Haku during the match just to prove he could. If you know about Haku, you're probably aware that this didn't go well for Canek, much to the amusement of the other wrestlers in the locker room, many of whom don't like Canek anyway.

[El Canuck]

Ah yes, a true one in the mix. I love that story.

[El Canuck]

When life gives Haku lemons, he eats them whole.