CHIKARA Returns (Simulation)

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Jama7301
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Re: CHIKARA Returns (Simulation)

Post by Jama7301 » Sat Mar 22, 2014 9:12 am

I'm kinda glad I could pick up the former Chris Masters. Buff guy in white body paint is just hilarious to me.

Also, fun fact, all my matches took a hit because I forgot to adjust the intensity for the crowd. I gave them too serious of matches
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Re: CHIKARA Returns (Simulation)

Post by GooberBM » Sat Mar 22, 2014 9:59 am

I hope you didn't pay your makeup team in money because if you did, they robbed you*

*unless you paid them in singles
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Re: CHIKARA Returns (Simulation)

Post by Jama7301 » Sat Mar 22, 2014 10:26 am

50 dollars in nickles.
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Re: CHIKARA Returns (Simulation)

Post by GooberBM » Sat Mar 22, 2014 10:35 am

That won't stuff down Masterpiece's trunks easy at all then...
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Jama7301
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Re: CHIKARA Returns (Simulation)

Post by Jama7301 » Sat Mar 22, 2014 11:06 am

Can't have them getting too distracted when they're on the clock.
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Re: CHIKARA Returns (Simulation)

Post by Greg_McNeish » Sat Mar 22, 2014 2:47 pm

Slave driver.
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Jama7301
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Re: CHIKARA Returns (Simulation)

Post by Jama7301 » Sun Mar 23, 2014 10:52 pm

Yes, I'm the slave driver when I provide them with the privilege of working for me.
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Re: CHIKARA Returns (Simulation)

Post by Greg_McNeish » Mon Mar 24, 2014 12:10 am

Asshole.
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Jama7301
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Re: CHIKARA Returns (Simulation)

Post by Jama7301 » Mon Mar 24, 2014 12:20 am

Oh yeah? WELL AT LEAST THEY'RE NOT ON FIRE!



Yet
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El Canuck
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Re: CHIKARA Returns (Simulation)

Post by El Canuck » Mon Mar 24, 2014 12:22 am

Huh, I just now picked up that Statue was Chris Masters. Way to be slow on the draw Nucks.
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Re: CHIKARA Returns (Simulation)

Post by Jama7301 » Mon Mar 24, 2014 12:24 am

S'all good. I just thought the gimmick of a living statue was hilarious. Especially when he can revert to stone to fuck with his opponents. As soon as I signed him, I wanted him to have a goofy gimmick.

Also: Fuck yeah, got Eagles to sign, and I know exactly what I'm going to do with her.

And Evie. Not sure what to do with her yet, but it'll be something.
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Re: CHIKARA Returns (Simulation)

Post by Greg_McNeish » Mon Mar 24, 2014 12:32 am

She's an ice cream fanatic, if that helps.

Also, MADDIE FUCKIN' EAGLES~!~!~!~!
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Re: CHIKARA Returns (Simulation)

Post by Jama7301 » Mon Mar 24, 2014 12:36 am

I also scooped up Anya as well to round out that hiring spree.
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Re: CHIKARA Returns (Simulation)

Post by El Canuck » Mon Mar 24, 2014 1:31 am

A spree is the wrong word, it sounds more like a hiring bonanza.
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Re: CHIKARA Returns (Simulation)

Post by Jama7301 » Mon Mar 24, 2014 1:41 am

I'm basically shunning the entire established CHIKARA roster, with a few exceptions.
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Re: CHIKARA Returns (Simulation)

Post by Greg_McNeish » Mon Mar 24, 2014 2:16 am

Works for me. I happen to think that most of their roster sucks at — what do they call it... wrestling.
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Re: CHIKARA Returns (Simulation)

Post by Jama7301 » Mon Mar 31, 2014 3:46 pm

CHIKARA Power!
From the Mid-Hudson Civic Center, Poughkeepsie NY
Attendance: 2156

Backstage Event: Kobold let rip a fart that made the locker room unusable for 30 minutes. Others were less than pleased at him. I ended up taking no action against him.


Dark Match
Saturyne vs Jessicka Havok
Havok smash in her dark match debut.

Rating: E-

Main Show

The show starts off with Wink Vavasseur, Matt Striker, and Miss Kimberlee standing at the top of the ramp. Wink beings “We returned to action a few weeks ago after a series of, unfortunate, occurrences. During our first show, we were in chaos, but not tonight. Tonight, I fill in for Mr. Quackenbush, as he is out rehabbing a broken leg. Currently, we have no owner, we have no champion, we have no order. So, until such a time that he is able to return, as the Director of Fun, will be running the show. I was the one who called Mr. Striker last week, to come in and help CHIKARA return to wrestling purity.” Vavasseur hands the mic over to Striker who’s wearing a smile “Thank you Wink, for welcoming me to CHIKARA. I am here to find the next big star that CHIKARA can ride to the top of the wrestling world. Before we can find that individual though, we have to clean up this environment. Currently, CHIKARA is a rocky, desolate wasteland, but by the time I’m done, this will be a cultivated garden, with talent blooming all around. That means that things like this will not stand. Miss Kimberlee, play the tape.” A replay shows of Mike Angelosetti hitting Sugar Dunkerton repeatedly with a squeaky hammer, to which the crowd cheers. “This type of ‘lowest common denominator’ entertainment will not stand in the new CHIKARA. Tonight, my work starts when I have a match with some joker, to prove once and for all, that my way, is the right way.”

Rating: D-

Match 1
Arctic Rescue Ant & Fire Ant vs Kobald & Kodama

Wink is on commentary for this show, and as soon as the wrestlers are announced he voices his displeasure with the ludicrous scene in front of him. Kobald takes the pinfall in this match when Arctic Rescue Ant hits an inverted DDT for the win.

Rating: E-

Back in the catering area, we have a camera following someone wearing a hoodie backstage. They walk up to where the coffee pot is, but find that it’s empty. Someone points them to the coffee machine by the bathroom, but warns that it might not be fixed yet. The hooded person walks down the hallway, and sees Ricochet & Icarus fighting in the hallway, both drenched in coffee from the machine. The coffee machine is covered in dents and the lights are flickering on and off. The person takes off their hood to reveal that it’s Madison Eagles, and she looks none-too-pleased that these hoodlums have broken the machine.

Rating: D-

Match 2
Matt Striker vs Create-a-Wrestler
Striker is out in black tights, black boots, and black wrist tape, basically the cliché “serious wrestler” getup. Create A Wrestler comes out dressed up like the unholy union between Jeff Hardy and Hulk Hogan. Before the bell rings though, Striker is laying into CAW with boots and forearms. The ref manages to pull Striker away, and checks on CAW. CAW manages to catch his breath, and the ref starts the match. As soon as the bell rings though, Striker takes it to CAW even harder, and throws him around. Striker caps off the beat down with a Rolling Fujiwara Armbar, forcing CAW to tap out.

Rating: E-

After the match, Miss Kimberlee enters the ring with a microphone and a towel. She hands the mic to Striker, and begins to dab the towel at the sweat on his forehead and back. “See the power of a formally trained wrestler! These jokers and entertainers that CHIKARA is composed of cannot hope to stand up to me. Change is coming CHIKARA; embrace it.

Rating: D+

In the back, we’re in a dark room. A light flicks on as a backstage worker searches through the storage room. He looks up and sees The Masterpiece posed in the back, hands on hips. The employee walks over to it, noticing that there’s something different about the statue. Apparently, this version of the Masterpiece was a champion, as he has a championship belt chiseled around his waist. The employee grabs the cable he came in for, and leaves, turning the light off as he goes.

Rating: D

We jump back to ringside to see Madison Eagles dragging Icarus to the ring, forcefully. She throws him into the ring, and barks at the ref, yelling that she’s cranky, and just start the match.

Rating: D-

Match 3
Madison Eagles vs Icarus
Madison – coffee + guy who ruined coffee machine = dead Icarus via Hellbound.

Rating: E-

We go backstage to see that the Masterpiece is on a trolly, and being rolled out to the ring. We follow his adventure from the backstage area to the ramp, where he’s stopped, as his sparklers go off, and then he’s rolled down to the ring. He’s left on the trolly as his opponent for his match comes out.

Rating: C-

Main Event
The Masterpiece vs Scott Parker

The Masterpiece is still at ringside after Parker enters the ring. He slowly moves his head from left to right, and then his whole body starts moving. Part by part, he loosens up, and climbs up on to the apron and into the ring. The Masterpiece is limbered up and the match is set to start. The Masterpiece stays animated for most of the match, and eventually, Parker starts to try to put the Masterpiece away. He hoists the Masterpiece up for a Suplex, but the Masterpiece turns back to stone, and comes crashing down on top of Parker! Parker kicks and thrashes, but he can’t get the statue off of him, and the ref counts the pinfall.

Rating: E+

After the match, The Masterpiece reanimates and celebrates with in the ring. Wink throws his headset off at the commentary table, and Striker and Miss Kimberlee come down to the ring. Striker and Wink enter from opposite side, and they’re none too pleased at The Masterpiece. They start yelling at him, but he’s already returned to a statue. The show ends with the two of them yelling and pointing fingers at a statue in the middle of the ring.

Rating: D+
Show Rating: E+


Still can't quite figure out the right match settings that the fans like. Apparently my matches hit too hard for their liking.
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Greg_McNeish
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Re: CHIKARA Returns (Simulation)

Post by Greg_McNeish » Mon Mar 31, 2014 7:46 pm

Maddie Eagles was there to kick heads and drink coffee... and she was all out of coffee.

Also...

#Masterpiece4Champ
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Jama7301
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Re: CHIKARA Returns (Simulation)

Post by Jama7301 » Mon Mar 31, 2014 7:55 pm

It's so strange how they can't find that belt. Wonder where it ended up...
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Re: CHIKARA Returns (Simulation)

Post by Greg_McNeish » Mon Mar 31, 2014 7:59 pm

Given CHIKARA's history, an alternate dimension is the most likely place to find it.
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